Thursday, January 12, 2012

So I thought I was being so brave

after.....I don't know, about 10 or more spiders crawling on me through take down ......

I thought I was making progress on my phobia.

I had managed to pick up countless items and put them away, only to find that were spiders on them after the fact.....and you should be proud of me....many I spotted in the process and soldiered along.

I was moving along at a pace where I truly was planning on giving myself a full commendation .......I was on the road to recover.

Then......the spider of doom entered my life.

As with all spiders it seems smaller and much less scary from a distance..


Let me explain.....our panels for most props are a wood frame with foam glued on that we texture to look like what ever foam surface we choose......not only do the 1x2 work to make the frames.....when completed with foam attached offer good hand holds to grab so that you do not damage the foam.

Pretty close to perfect.

Yep.......

Except if you are me.

Most of the crew humors my spider "problem".   Much nicer than I would if the roles were reverse. :D

So, after a very stressful situation where I put a panel from the abbey up in the shop with the help of a few fantastic minions......I notice something..........

Where I had my hand placed to carry the panel up for placement appears to be the home for one of largest spiders in the universe.

To be fair, my cry's of help where answered by one my crew......who after rescue attempts....for the spiders......not me.......said WTF!!!

WTF!!  So many times that I was interested........

.....mind you not enough to actually go look at what they were talking about.

The first spider I complained about.......and for me if I complained.....there were at least 10 others that I said nothing about......trying to grow my cowardly self into something resembling less of a psycho.

But I failed......

Failure........on any level, for me, really depends on contact.

If the spider crawls on me at any time..........failure is certain.

Spider walking on the Frog Queen will always end in screaming.......and at lease a bottle of wine or few rum drinks........otherwise I fall into the void of madness.......

More then I already have......

This is where you learn your friends.....are enemies.

Dawn bravely (extremely) catches both the frist spider and then on to the other spider....the one I could not speak of.....in a paper cup......

I guess while both spiders are in the paper cup together trying to fight their way to freedom......the comments from the crew (who I hear LOVES me - at least that is what they say!) turns toxic

Dawn and Lisa......who I thought were my friends..........both tell me that the spider that they caught that was closed to my had was past at category 4 spider.....

Phill Jupius has taught me well..............Category 4 is bad.........

I think that Lisa said that was the largest spider she had ever seen.......{{{swwoon}}}}

They both go on on explain how it barely fit in the cup and when they showed it to husband it really freaked him out.

And he is not afraid of spiders...............

I pause for a second, and take a look at these "friends" that want to help me but realize that my life just changed.

I then, understood for the first time in my life the true danger I was in......and I understood that I need friends that are better liars.

"Oh FQ, we are going to take this tinsy-winsy spider outside"....is what they should have said.

These are moments when the world falls apart on you my friends, and no amount of therepy of super glue is ever going to make this right again.......

Does anyone want a mausoleum?  Really, not kidding, we are selling it........to be honest we came to that decision before the spider.....but the spider did help me not thing twice. :)

I think I might need to take up knitting for a hobby.....I am guessing there are less spiders involved!!

12 comments:

  1. I totally understand...spiders are NOT for me either. That and beans. Yes...beans!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I was really, really hoping for a picture of the "Spider of Doom"! I'm curious to know what kind of spidey it was.
    I'm glad that he didn't touch you :) The haunt community can't afford for you to go mad :)
    Hope that there aren't anymore crazy spider encounters for you in 2012 ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sorry FQ...You know if I was capable of lying I would have lied about the size of the spider. (That and I was afraid the spider would eat me if I called him tiny!) :D

    ReplyDelete
  4. I. too, have had giant spider experiences that have creeped me out. My Achilles heel is cockroaches, though! Those beggars FLY! WTF?!

    And I would take your mausoleum if I had a way of getting it down here. I've wanted one for a long time!

    Only haunters can understand a statement like that, huh? :oD

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hmmmmm...knitting? I mean, isn't that what Spiders naturally do...knit??? Just thought I'd point that out...since I'm kinda evil.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Good thing that the Spider of Doom did not touch you. Would have like to see a picture of it though :-)

    Like ShellHawk, I would take your mausoleum anytime. Only if I had a way to get it shipped to Quebec without it costing me an arm and a leg ;-) It's a shame that the Star Trek teleporter does not exist yet...

    ReplyDelete
  7. I always think about these things from the spider's perspective. Must be strange to have these giants moving your house around all the time.

    I'm terrified of moths. So at least you don't have that lame ass problem.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh don't fear spiders! They are fascinating creatures: their web is both delicate and deadly, and can often be a real work of art. They can be scary, but they can also be vulnerable.

    ReplyDelete
  9. The Frog Queens Adventures in Knitting:

    http://kellicrowe.typepad.com/.a/6a00d83452456569e201310fcd663a970c-800wi

    :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. LOL! You bloggers are not my friends.....well some of you....okay, maybe I am just talking about Marrow and Gill-Man :D

    Those comments cracked me up. (thanks)

    Thanks for the support everyone!

    Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I love spiders and would love, love, love to buy your spider infested mosoleum! I feel your pain, however, because I have a fear of cockroaches and would sell anything that there was a giant cockroach living in.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I agree with the Countess - I want to see a picture! And laugh Frog Queen - think of the terror you must have put into the heart of that spider when she saw a being as large as you reaching her way.

    ReplyDelete

Blog Archive