So yesterday when I got home after a particularly crappy day at work. I find a package for me with my cool pumpkin that I won from ShellHawk on Ebay!
Happy Frog Queen!
I open it up, it has a few other little goodies in it (very nice, and thank you) and a beautiful ceramic pumpkin candle holder.
As I am taking it out of the box and put it on the corner of my potions cabinet. I round up all three cats and we a have "safety" talk.
I convene the meeting by telling them.
"Here is how to insure you live long and happy lives in my house."
"Demon cats, now normally when you break stuff, I let it go....I mean you are house cats (well, two of you - but Hal, you get the lecture to, so you cannot come back and say "well you didn't tell me!") and you get bored and climbing somewhere you have not been is fun......but warning, see this area here.....right here...when this pumpkin is?"
Dorie starts to walk away! "Door! Pay attention!!"
"Listen you three.....this here is a cat free zone."
"No cats here, understand, cause if you break this pumpkin...."
Mason looks up at me as to say "What? You going to throw us outside? Cause if that is the case, Dorie, out of my way so I break it, cause this house cat thing sucks...."
"No, you are not going outside....you are going to die!"
Hal looks at them both and says - "She says that all the time.....don't worry, just put on that cute face and...."
"Hal, stop it!"
"I mean it this time."
They all roll their eyes at me. Mason starts licking his stomach in boredom.
Fine. I see I have lost control of this situation.
I look at them and in my most commanding voice I say...."just go ahead, break it and see what happens."
Dorie looks bored and walks away, Hal follows. Mason starts licking his b....
Damn cats!
Plan "B" - where is the Quake Secure?
I get a pumpkin spice votive out of the drawer and put it in the candle. I light in and turn off the lights.....it is pure magic!I am now in a happy place and head off back to the office to do a few things.
I see the box and start taking the packing material out of it to put it in the recycling bin.
Pull out a nice piece of paper only to see three small black things on the bubble wrap.
I should have know better.
What can those be?
OMG!!! It is three plastic spiders!!
I drop the box with a small scream.
To which several cats come in and check out the box.
They proceed to pull the spiders out of the box and bat them around the office.
Once again, I have lost control of the situation.
Fine.
I think there is some laundry in the basement, my plastic-spider-free basement. :)
I walk down the stairs with a big smile.....damn, that was good! I think I like this girl! :D
FQF
I was waiting for the part of the story where you screamed the cats freaked and broke your new pumpkin candle holder...
ReplyDeleteI am glad the story didn't end the way I thought it would...
My spiders from ShellHawk are living on our kitchen bar, where I keep catching them out of the corner of my eye thinking they're real!
ReplyDeleteReids called it, I was thinking the same thing and had knots in my stomach reading ahead =D
ReplyDeleteVery entertaining story as always :-)
ReplyDeleteGlad the cats haven't broken the pumpkin . . . yet!
ReplyDeleteHow funny! :0)
ReplyDeleteLOL! This cracked me up! I can totally relate, because I too have two demon cats... one that insists on chewing the stems off of foam pumpkins and randomly chewing on props that I've made... maybe I need to have this little talk with him >=)
ReplyDeleteThe next mourning I come down to work in the office and I see one of the plastic spiders on the floor out of the corner of my eye. For a second I do a quick double take and step back before I realize that Dorie has just left it on the floor after tossing it around the office. I don't even know where the other ones are?
ReplyDeleteI could have sworn the cats were going to break something too. Luckily, the plastic spiders shock seemed to be the worst of it.
ReplyDeleteI sometimes have to have talks with my dogs recently to when I tell them that my laptop table is not a chew post. So I see where you are coming from.
Dummy me! I didn't even think of the scare factor, I just thought you'd find a use for them! :o)
ReplyDeleteBy the way, the eyeball keychain lights up!