Friday, March 11, 2011

Dear......

My good friend at work sent me this - not really "halloween" related.  But very funny.....and the last one if perfect for the frog queen :D

Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic

Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic.. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Sincerely,
Anonymous

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada

Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely,
Google

Dear Nickleback,
That's enough.
Sincerely, 
The World

Dear iPhone, Please stop spellchecking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone User

My personal fav


Dear Giant Spider on the Wall,
Please die. Please die. Please die. Please die. CRAP! Where did you go?
Sincerely,
Terrified (aka - the frog queen.)
As decreed by at

12 comments:

  1. BarbMarch 11, 2011 at 2:34 PM

    LOL! Thanks for the much needed giggle :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousMarch 11, 2011 at 2:55 PM

    Haha, those were funny! I especially like the Twilight one. lol

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jessica PenotMarch 11, 2011 at 3:30 PM

    Very Funny! I loved all of these. That Iphone one had me laughing. One of my husband's coworkers tried to text him that his pen broke and exploded in his pants. Due to a typo iphone spellchecked it to say his penis broke and exploded in his pants. I love iphone spellcheck.

    ReplyDelete
  4. MortisSanguineMarch 11, 2011 at 8:58 PM

    Dear Twilight Fans,

    Also, even if the vamp could control their blood flow and get an erection their climax would be cold. Imagine that sensation.

    Sincerely,

    Ewwwwwwwwwwww. And it is runny.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Justine’s HalloweenMarch 11, 2011 at 9:03 PM

    hehe! Oh those are great. Thanks for the laugh. :) I can't help but notice your "Spider Fest" badge next to this post...

    ReplyDelete
  6. CarrieMarch 11, 2011 at 9:31 PM

    Brilliant!! Especially the iphone one, autocorrect can go to he'll!

    ReplyDelete
  7. KulkuriMarch 12, 2011 at 6:36 AM

    In "TruBlood" the vamps get it on in many ways. It seems like each author of vampire stories makes up their own rules for vampires. In "Being Human" the vamp not only gets it up, but also goes around in daylight.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousMarch 12, 2011 at 7:25 AM

    Haven't seen Twilight, but the line about vampires having an erection is comical.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Debra She Who SeeksMarch 12, 2011 at 10:55 AM

    Is it a coincidence that both Bieber and Nickleback are from Canada? Or a horrible conspiracy?

    ReplyDelete
  10. AnonymousMarch 12, 2011 at 2:11 PM

    Hahaha, you piece of shut... I LOVE IT! :) Thanks for the laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousMarch 13, 2011 at 7:24 AM

    ....fear itself and zombies. You forgot about the zombies.

    I think we should tar and feather the geek who came up with predictive text. Yes I do.

    ReplyDelete
  12. The Gill-ManMarch 18, 2011 at 8:31 AM

    Oh man...thanks for the MUCH needed laugh!!!

    ReplyDelete

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